Just in case you don't know what's going on here. You'll need to read this first.

Under Review (UR): What's that, wacky hard working producer? We have a surprise guest on the phone? Who is it?

Wacky, Hard Working Producer: We actually have David Stern on the line.

UR: Great job. Welcome to the show, NBA commissioner David Stern.

Stern: Thanks for having me on. After I heard your interview with Kobe on Monday, I felt it was time for me to come clean with some things. It sure seems to have worked out for Kobe.

UR: We love a good conspiracy theory here at PIUR. Where do you want to start: NBA referees, the Jordan suspension, 1985 Draft Lottery?

Stern: Man, there's so many things to talk about here. You just bring up a topic and fire away?

UR: It seems to us that so many playoff series have been fixed by refereeing. Whether it's just one game or a whole series, does the NBA instruct referees to call a game a certain way in hopes that it might effect the outcome of the game?

Stern: Refereeing is a difficult task. Especially, with the speed and size of today's athlete. In fact, I have it on good authority that you might have blown a call in a 2nd & 3rd grade girls basketball game earlier this year.

UR: Mr. Stern, may we remind you that you're on here answering questions honestly. We don't want the standard answers.

Stern: Got it. But you have to admit you blew the call.

UR: Yes I did.

Stern: OK, here's the thing with refereeing. In today's game you could call a foul every time down the court. The game wasn't meant to be played as physical as it is today. You can blame the Pistons of the late 80's and the Knicks of the 90's for that.

With that being said, certain match ups are more favorable as far as TV ratings go. Think about last year. Did anyone care about San Antonio v Cleveland? On the flip side, imagine if we had a Boston v LA series in the finals this year. That would draw national interest, along with several columns stating that the NBA is back.

Keeping those two thoughts in mind. Why wouldn't we encourage refs to make calls a certain way. It's a win win for us. Even when there is a bad call, it generates so much talk around the nation that more people want to tune in.

The players still have to make plays, we just encourage certain plays to happen.

UR: Fair enough. Though, we knew it all along. On to the Jordan conspiracy. Did you suspend him from play for a year and a half for gambling?

Stern: Let's see. The top player in the league "retires", only to return 18 months later. What do you think happened?

UR: So if he was suspended, why didn't you announce it? Take a stand against gambling.

Stern: MJ was our most important brand at the time. If everyone suspected him of cheating, he would have lost all credibility, as well as our league. Look at Barry Bonds. Everyone suspects him of cheating, therefore his credibility was shot. Even before his 70 home run season, he put up some great numbers. No one will remember that because of the steroid scandal.

We wanted to give MJ a chance to come back with a clean slate. It helped all involved and to this day everything has worked out.

UR: We've got some video for you. How did you fix the NBA draft so that the Knicks would get the first pick?

Stern: If you'll notice when the envelopes are placed in the bin, one, in the middle, is placed differently. That envelope, which was weighted differently, was strategically placed so I would know which one had the Knicks in it. Unfortunately for me, the guy placing the envelopes in the bin was so nervous that he fumbled the "envelope" all over the place. What a goof!

As for why I did it, I had too. New York is the mecca of professional basketball. They needed him, much more than Golden State did. Look at the NBA right now. Do you realize what would happen if LeBron "happened" to end up in New York? We need him there. Cleveland will be fine without him in a couple of years.

UR: You're speaking as if LeBron is already gone to New York.

Stern: Um, well, yea. He will be there. New York needs him. It's a shame that the NBA is peaking again and New York isn't apart of it. We need the Garden to be rocking during the playoffs. That's the final step to getting the NBA back to where it needs to be, post Jordan.

UR: Commish, we appreciate your honesty today. We don't want to keep you too long. Any final thoughts?

Stern: The NBA. It's Fannnnnnnntastic.